Why It's Hard for People to Say Goodbye
Karen Jane Ng
Whether you're willing to admit it or not, we know that most, if not all, of us hate to throw stuff that holds sentimental value. You hate ending a day when you're having too much fun. You even hate transferring school or changing jobs. You hate letting go of people who have long been a big part of your life and you hate death. To cut it short, you hate goodbyes.
It's more unbearable than any physical pain there is, so, yes, we get it. But more than the emotional pang inside, here are other reasons why "goodbyes" will never come easy for us:
1. We got used to things. We've always dreamed to change the world but not necessarily our lives and the factors that come with it. Think about moving house thus forcing you to bid farewell to your childhood or school friends who you grew up with for years and who you see and hang out with on a daily basis. Suddenly cutting that from our routine just won't sit right that fast with us.
2. We love convenience. Not to seem dependent, but, yes, we find it favorable to know that we have someone we can call in a flash when we need help, that we can meet with people when we're bored or when we miss them, and the idea that we're going to school or the office with people we're already comfortable with just puts us at ease. Taking that comfort away only gives room for anxiety.
3. We're scared to start all over again. There you go with the feeling of anxiousness over making new friends, fitting in at an unfamiliar place, or the mere act of applying at a new job. Figuring out what will happen to us after losing someone and if we will ever be able to get past it bring us fear. The point of uncertainty just become eminent leading us to be hesitant on moving forward.
As we grow older, we start to learn to be more tolerant of goodbyes and to be better in braving the face of it. We might have pulled it off well but that doesn't mean it's finally okay. We'll accept it because we have no choice. Even more so, we still hate it.