How a Breakup Motivated This Girl to Improve Her All-Around Well-Being
Maan de Vera
We’ve said it before, and we’ll say it again: sometimes, break-ups can lead to glow-ups. It all depends on how you want to move forward with the end of your romantic relationship. As for Iya Maglaqui, the answer is simple. This girl was determined to take charge and make the most out of the pain that she felt a couple of years ago.
If you want to follow her lead, turn lemons into lemonades, and get over your heartache in the healthiest way possible, then here are 5 things that you should do according to Iya:
1. Embrace the pain.
"I really just cried until I finally got tired."
No shortcuts. It’s bound to hurt for a little while before you can truly heal. So, willing yourself to get over it especially if the wound is still fresh. You’re only human after all. Cry if you have to. Talk to your friends and family about it. Welcome and confront that hurt because that’s where you’ll learn.
"Of course, there was self-pity...I keep on asking myself if the relationsip ended because there was something wrong with me."
Ask yourself the difficult questions. Is there anything that you would’ve done or said differently? At any point, were you the toxic one in the relationship? Or did you allow them to overstep your boundaries? Is it really best that you two ended things up? Be objective about it. Find the answers no matter how difficult it may seem because this will prevent you from making the same mistakes.
3. Let go and accept.
"There were so many things for me to accept...that it didn't work out, that we must go on our separate ways, and that I need to happy on my own."
You may feel like you’re spiralling down, and that’s normal. But you need to understand the fact that there are things that are simply out of your control. You just have to let it be because we don’t have the final say on how other people feel for us or how they treat us. Be at peace with letting things be, even if it’s not what you hoped for.
4. Redirect your energy to yourself.
"At first, I started doing things because I wanted to get back at my ex. But, slowly, I realized that I have to do things for me."
Although there are things that you don’t have power over, you always have the choice to take care of yourself. If that means being more fit, then do that. Research ways on how to tone your body. Put in the work everyday to your diet and workout routine. Do it for you and not for anyone else.
5. Be persistent.
"You need to learn that these things don't happen overnight. It may take months or even years to reach your goal."
Moving on isn’t linear. Sometimes, you may think that you’ve got it all figured out and that you’re no longer hurt. But there will be days that it will all relapse and you’ll find yourself drowning and sadness again. However, whenever that happens, you just need to repeat the steps from the top until it doesn’t bother you for good.
Ending things up with an S.O. will always be a challenging part of life. There will be moments when you may feel like it’s impossible to move forward without the person who held a significant spot in your world. But, at the end of the day, no relationship is more important than the one that you have with yourself and that you need to learn self-love especially at a time when romance fails you.